Is Your Child Treating Giving Season Like Gimme Season? Hereβs the Science Behind Why β and How to Fix It
The holidays come with magic… but they also come with wish lists, commercials, family pressure, and kids who suddenly seem laser-focused on what they’re getting next.
If your child is treating giving season a little more like gimme season, you’re not alone — and it’s not your fault. There are predictable developmental and psychological reasons this happens. And thankfully? There are also incredibly simple, science-backed ways to build generosity that stick.
Today, I want to share the core idea behind raising generous kids — the one principle that makes everything else easier — and then I’ll point you to something special we created to help you bring this to life in your home this holiday season.
π§ The Science: Kids Don’t Learn Generosity from Being Told to “Be Nice.” They Learn It From What They See.
Research in developmental psychology is remarkably consistent:
Kids develop social behaviors through modeling, repetition, and emotional association.
This means:
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Generosity is caught, not taught.
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Kids copy what they observe far more than what they’re instructed to do.
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Giving behaviors stick when paired with positive emotion (connection, pride, joy).
In other words?
If we want generosity to become part of who our kids are, it has to be something they regularly see, feel, and participate in — not something talked about once in December.
β¨ Why the Holidays Can Bring Out the “Gimme” Side of Kids
Several forces collide during the holidays:
1. Developmentally, kids are egocentric — it’s normal.
Young children are wired to think about their own wants first. It’s part of healthy development, not a character flaw.
2. The season is structured around receiving.
Holiday traditions, school events, commercials, toy catalogs — everything is designed to trigger desire, not generosity.
3. Much of adult generosity is invisible.
We quietly Venmo donations, drop off items, tip extra, or send gifts.
Kids don’t see the giving — so they don’t learn from it.
4. Without visibility, generosity can’t become a habit.
The brain can’t repeat what it can’t observe.
This is actually good news, because it means the key to raising a generous kid isn’t complicated…
π The #1 Habit That Builds Lifelong Generosity: Make Giving Visible
If you remember nothing else from this blog post, remember this:
Kids need to see generosity — not just hear about it.
When you:
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Narrate an act of kindness,
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Let them help deliver a donation,
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Let them choose a cause they care about,
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Do one tiny act of giving each day…
…you’re building real neural pathways associated with empathy, pride, and connection.
Small, visible acts of generosity — practiced often — accumulate into a genuine identity:
“I’m someone who helps.”
And that identity lasts far longer than any wrapped gift ever could.
π± Want to Build This Habit in Your Home This Month?
Join our 5-Day Holiday Giving Challenge.**
If this message is resonating and you’re thinking, “Okay… but how do I actually DO this in real life with my kids?” — you’re exactly who we created something special for.
The 5-Day Holiday Giving Challenge
is a simple, joyful family experience that helps you:
β¨ Make giving visible
β¨ Model generosity without overwhelm
β¨ Build gratitude into your daily rhythm
β¨ Teach your kids how to give their time, treasure, and kindness
β¨ Create a family culture of generosity that lasts
Each day includes:
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Two short videos (one explains the psychology, one gives simple, doable strategies)
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Six beautiful printables, including a 30 Days of Giving Calendar
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A private community for support, inspiration, and shared stories
It’s low-pressure, high-impact, and designed for busy families who want to make the holidays more meaningful.
Want in? Click here to join.
Let’s make giving the heart of your holiday season — starting today. π
